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Rodney Dangerfield quotes

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American Comedian, 1921-2004

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    I Like this quote I dislike this quote“My uncle's dying wish - he wanted me on his lap. He was in the electric chair.”

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    I Like this quote I dislike this quote“My cousins gay, he went to London only to find out that Big Ben was a clock.”

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    I Like this quote I dislike this quote“I get no respect. The way my luck is running, if I was a politician I would be honest.”

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    I Like this quote I dislike this quote“My wife's jealousy is getting ridiculous. The other day she looked at my calendar and wanted to know who May was.”

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    I Like this quote I dislike this quote“With me, nothing goes right. My psychiatrist said my wife and I should have sex every night. Now, we'll never see each other!”

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    I Like this quote I dislike this quote“I'm so ugly - My mother had morning sickness - After I was born”

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    I Like this quote I dislike this quote“What a kid I got, I told him about the birds and the bee and he told me about the butcher and my wife.”

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    I Like this quote I dislike this quote“Yeah, I know I'm ugly... I said to a bartender, 'Make me a zombie.' He said 'God beat me to it.'”

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    I Like this quote I dislike this quote“Acting deals with very delicate emotions. It is not putting up a mask. Each time an actor acts he does not hide; he exposes himself.”

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    I Like this quote I dislike this quote“On Halloween, the parents sent their kids out looking like me.”

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