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“When I was crossing the border into Canada, they asked if I had any firearms with me. I said, "Well, what do you need?"”
Stephen Wright quotes (American Actor and Writer, b.1955)

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“It doesn't make a difference what temperature a room is, it's always room temperature.”
Stephen Wright quotes (American Actor and Writer, b.1955)
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“If toast always lands butter-side down, and cats always land on their feet, what happens if you strap toast on the back of a cat and drop it?”
Stephen Wright quotes (American Actor and Writer, b.1955)
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“A lot of people ask me if I were shipwrecked, and could only have one book, what would it be? I always say 'How to Build a Boat”
Stephen Wright quotes (American Actor and Writer, b.1955)
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“If you shoot at mimes, should you use a silencer?”
Stephen Wright quotes (American Actor and Writer, b.1955)
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“Well, you know when you're rocking in a rocking chair, and you go so far that you almost fall over backwards, but at the last instant you catch yourself? That's how I feel all the time”
Stephen Wright quotes (American Actor and Writer, b.1955)
Similar Quotes. About: Doing Your Best quotes.
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“If a word in the dictionary were misspelled, how would we know?”
Stephen Wright quotes (American Actor and Writer, b.1955)
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“On the other hand, you have different fingers.”
Stephen Wright quotes (American Actor and Writer, b.1955)
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“I have the world's largest collection of seashells. I keep it on all the beaches of the world... perhaps you've seen it.”
Stephen Wright quotes (American Actor and Writer, b.1955)
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“If one synchronised swimmer drowns, do all the rest have to drown too?”
Stephen Wright quotes (American Actor and Writer, b.1955)
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“A friend of mine once sent me a post card with a picture of the entire planet Earth taken from space. On the back it said, "Wish you were here."”
Stephen Wright quotes (American Actor and Writer, b.1955)
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