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“To enter Europe, you must have a valid passport with a photograph of yourself in which you look like you are being booked on charges of soliciting sheep.”
santiz Dave Barry quotes (American Writer and Humorist best known for his weekly newspaper column. b.1947)

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“Magnetism is one of the Six Fundamental Forces of the Universe, with the other five being Gravity, Duct Tape, Whining, Remote Control, and The Force That Pulls Dogs Toward The Groins Of Strangers.”
Dave Barry quotes (American Writer and Humorist best known for his weekly newspaper column. b.1947)
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“Admit it, sport-utility-vehicle owners! It's shaped a little differently, but it's a station wagon! And you do not drive it across rivers! You drive it across the Wal-Mart parking lot!”
Dave Barry quotes (American Writer and Humorist best known for his weekly newspaper column. b.1947)
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“Hobbies of any kind are boring except to people who have the same hobby. (This is also true of religion, although you will not find me saying so in print.)”
Dave Barry quotes (American Writer and Humorist best known for his weekly newspaper column. b.1947)
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“If you asked me to name the three scariest threats facing the human race, I would give the same answer that most people would: nuclear war, global warming and Windows.”
Dave Barry quotes (American Writer and Humorist best known for his weekly newspaper column. b.1947)
Similar Quotes. About: Global Warming quotes.
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“Eating rice cakes is like chewing on a foam coffee cup, only less filling.”
Dave Barry quotes (American Writer and Humorist best known for his weekly newspaper column. b.1947)
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“Thus the metric system did not really catch on in the States, unless you count the increasing popularity of the nine-millimeter bullet.”
Dave Barry quotes (American Writer and Humorist best known for his weekly newspaper column. b.1947)
Similar Quotes. About: Popularity quotes.
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“One day soon the Gillette company will announce the development of a razor that, thanks to a computer microchip, can actually travel ahead in time and shave beard hairs that don't even exist yet”
Dave Barry quotes (American Writer and Humorist best known for his weekly newspaper column. b.1947)
Similar Quotes. About: Humor quotes, Funny quotes, Time quotes, Technology quotes.
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“Dogs feel very strongly that they should always go with you in the car, in case the need should arise for them to bark violently at nothing right in your ear”
Dave Barry quotes (American Writer and Humorist best known for his weekly newspaper column. b.1947)
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“The leading cause of death among fashion models is falling through street grates.”
Dave Barry quotes (American Writer and Humorist best known for his weekly newspaper column. b.1947)
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“Each year, millions of skiers come to Colorado to experience its superb emergency medical facilities.”
santiz Dave Barry quotes (American Writer and Humorist best known for his weekly newspaper column. b.1947)
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