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“There is only one cure for gray hair. It was invented by a Frenchman. It is called the guillotine.”
P. G. Wodehouse quotes

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“He was white and shaken, like a dry martini.”
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“She looked as if she had been poured into her clothes and had forgotten to say "when."”
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“Golf... is the infallible test. The man who can go into a patch of rough alone, with the knowledge that only God is watching him, and play his ball where it lies, is the man who will serve you faithfully and well.”
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“The least thing upset him on the links. He missed short putts because of the uproar of the butterflies in the adjoining meadows.”
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“I could see that, if not actually disgruntled, he was far from being gruntled.”
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“It is a good rule in life never to apologize. The right sort of people do not want apologies, and the wrong sort take a mean advantage of them.”
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“I just sit at a typewriter and curse a bit.”
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“The fascination of shooting as a sport depends almost wholly on whether you are at the right or wrong end of the gun.”
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“Why don't you get a haircut? You look like a chrysanthemum.”
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