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“So many people treat you like you're a kid so you might as well act like one and throw your television out of the hotel window.”
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“Ray- What is a large group of moose? Mooses? Mikey- No way! It's Meesi. Gerard- F*ck Off! It's Meese.”
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“I'd rather be a creature of the night than an old dude.”
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“I went to school in drag, in art school and my day was completely different because everybody thought I was a chick. You should see me as a chick. So I went as a girl, as like an experiment and it worked really well and everyone was really nice to me but I couldn't talk obviously...you know train conductors were really cool to me on my commute...HA! I looked hot as a chick!”
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“There was a moment in my life when I really wanted to kill myself. And there was one other moment when I was close to that. . . . But even in my most jaded times, I had some hope.”
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“If you don't go to highschool you will definitely go to jail.”
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“The Jersey mentality is: I work, I drink, I stay up all night, I try to meet a girl, it's a waste of time.”
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“Welcome to the new church! Can I get an 'Amen'?”
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“Cigarettes and coffee: an alcoholic's best friend!”
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“When I was writing it, I was remembering how hard it was to be a 16-year-old in high school. I always wanted to be an artist, so I was this loner kid who just got drunk all the time. I only had one real friend. There was a girl I really liked, and she ended up taking really sleazy photographs with her boyfriend, and that really crushed me, I was just swimming in this pit of despair, jealousy and alcoholism.”
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“It's like the drag fairy coming and saying 'What would you like to do?' Um, yeah karate.”
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