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“Mom, can we go Catholic so we can get communion wafers and booze?”
Bart Simpson quotes (Fictional character from the animated television series created by Matt Groening, The Simpsons.)

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“Always blame it on the guy who doesn't speak English”
Dan Castellaneta quotes (American Actor and Writer, b.1958) Character: Homer Simpson quotes. TV Show: The Simpsons quotes
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“Life is a paradox, you're damned if you do and damned if you don't”
Nancy Cartwright quotes (American Actress, b.1957) Character: Bart Simpson quotes. TV Show: The Simpsons quotes
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“A man who envies our family is a man who needs help.”
jcrow2747 Yeardley Smith quotes (French Actress, b.1964) Character: Lisa Simpson quotes. TV Show: The Simpsons quotes
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“I never thought it was humanly possible, but this both sucks and blows.”
kirglad Bart Simpson quotes (Fictional character from the animated television series created by Matt Groening, The Simpsons.)
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“Christmas is a time when people of all religions come together to worship Jesus Christ.”
Bart Simpson quotes (Fictional character from the animated television series created by Matt Groening, The Simpsons.)
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“It's just hard not to listen to TV: it's spent so much more time raising us than you have.”
Matt Groening quotes (American Cartoonist, creator of The Simpsons. b.1954) Character: Bart Simpson quotes. TV Show: The Simpsons quotes
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“Operator! Give me the number for 911”
Dan Castellaneta quotes (American Actor and Writer, b.1958) Character: Homer Simpson quotes. TV Show: The Simpsons quotes
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“Prohibition? HA! They tried that in the movies and it didn't work”
Homer Simpson quotes (Fictional character from the animated television series created by Matt Groening, The Simpsons.) Character: Homer Simpson quotes. TV Show: The Simpsons quotes
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“Dear God. We paid for all this stuff ourselves, so thanks for nothing.”
Semety Bart Simpson quotes (Fictional character from the animated television series created by Matt Groening, The Simpsons.)
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“Romance is dead - it was acquired in a hostile takeover by Hallmark and Disney, homogenized, and sold off piece by piece.”
Lisa Simpson quotes (Fictional character from the animated television series created by Matt Groening, The Simpsons.) Character: Lisa Simpson quotes. TV Show: The Simpsons quotes
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