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“If it wasn't for pick-pockets I'd have no sex life at all.”
Rodney Dangerfield quotes (American Comedian, 1921-2004)

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21-30 Quotations of 66

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“I met the surgeon general - he offered me a cigarette.”
Rodney Dangerfield quotes (American Comedian, 1921-2004)
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“This morning when I put on my underwear I could hear the fruit-of-the-loom guys laughing at me.”
Rodney Dangerfield quotes (American Comedian, 1921-2004)
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“I came from a real tough neighborhood. I put my hand in some cement and felt another hand.”
Rodney Dangerfield quotes (American Comedian, 1921-2004)
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“With me, nothing goes right. My psychiatrist said my wife and I should have sex every night. Now, we'll never see each other!”
Rodney Dangerfield quotes (American Comedian, 1921-2004)
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“I saved a girl from being attacked last night. I controlled myself.”
Rodney Dangerfield quotes (American Comedian, 1921-2004)
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“I remember the time I was kidnapped and they sent a piece of my finger to my father. He said he wanted more proof.”
Rodney Dangerfield quotes (American Comedian, 1921-2004)
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“"I am" is reportedly the shortest sentence in the English language. Could it be that "I do" is the longest sentence?”
George Carlin quotes (American stand-up Comedian, Actor and Author. b.1937)
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“I get no respect. The way my luck is running, if I was a politician I would be honest.”
Rodney Dangerfield quotes (American Comedian, 1921-2004)
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“We sleep in separate rooms, we have dinner apart, we take separate vacations - we're doing everything we can to keep our marriage together.”
Rodney Dangerfield quotes (American Comedian, 1921-2004)
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“I have good looking kids. Thank goodness my wife cheats on me.”
Rodney Dangerfield quotes (American Comedian, 1921-2004)
Similar Quotes. About: Children quotes, Cheating quotes.
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