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“I got a Valentine's Day card from my girl. It said, 'Take my heart! Take my arms! Take my lips!' Which is just like her. Keeping the best part for herself.”
Robert Orben quotes (US magician and comedy writer, b. 1927)

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“I don't understand why Cupid was chosen to represent Valentine's Day. When I think about romance, the last thing on my mind is a short, chubby toddler coming at me with a weapon.”

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“I feel bad for people who die on Valentine's Day. How much would flowers cost then, ten grand?”
Jay Leno quotes (American TV Host and Comedian, b.1950)
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“Never sign a Valentine with your own name.”
ariel Charles Dickens quotes (English novelist, generally considered the greatest of the Victorian era, 1812-1870)
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“I wanted to make it really special on Valentine's day, so I tied my boyfriend up. And for three solid hours I watched whatever I wanted on TV.”
Tracy Smith quotes
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“It takes more then lace and ribbons And lovely verses too To make a Valentine thats nice enough for you It takes a world of special thoughts tucked into every line and thats exactly what you'll find inside this valentine.”
ariel
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“Valentine's Day is when a lot of married men are reminded what a poor shot Cupid really is.”

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“Sales Ad at a Store: 'You are my one and only' valentine cards, now on sale: 4 for $5.”

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“A lovely heart-shaped box of chocolates was received on Valentine's Day by a coed from her newest date. On the enclosed card was the inscription, 'To Helen - with all my allowance.' Love me little, love me long, is the burden of my song.”

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“Oh, if it be to choose and call thee mine, love, thou art every day my Valentine!”
Thomas Hood quotes (English Poet and Humorist wrote poem Eugene Aram's Dream 1829, 1799-1845)
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