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“Do you know why they call it 'PMS'? Because 'Mad Cow Disease' was already taken.”

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11-20 Quotations of 1970

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“I used to think I was indecisive, but now I'm not so sure”

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“Sometimes I lie awake at night, and ask, 'Where have I gone wrong?' Then a voice says to me, 'This is going to take more than one night.'”
Charles M. Schulz quotes (American cartoonist, 1922-2000) Character: Charlie Brown quotes. Book: Peanuts quotes
Similar Quotes. About: Humor quotes, Wisdom quotes, Funny quotes, Lies quotes, Questioning quotes.
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“I want to die in my sleep like my grandfather... Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.”
Will Shriner quotes (American Comedian, b.1953)
Similar Quotes. About: Funny quotes, Death and dying quotes.
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“If you have a lot of tension and you get a headache, do what it says on the aspirin bottle: "Take two aspirin" and "Keep away from children".”

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“There Are Three Kinds of People - Those Who Can Count and Those Who Can't”

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“If toast always lands butter-side down, and cats always land on their feet, what happens if you strap toast on the back of a cat and drop it?”
Stephen Wright quotes (American Actor and Writer, b.1955)
Similar Quotes. About: Funny quotes, Cats quotes.
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“I may be drunk, Miss, but in the morning I will be sober and you will still be ugly.”
Winston Churchill quotes (British Orator, Author and Prime Minister during World War II. 1874-1965)
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“Everyone has a photographic memory. Some don't have film.”

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“Borrow money from a pessimist - they don't expect it back”

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“Never under any circumstances take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night”
Dave Barry quotes (American Writer and Humorist best known for his weekly newspaper column. b.1947)
Similar Quotes. About: Humor quotes, Funny quotes.
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