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“Just go up to somebody on the street and say "You're it!" and just run away.”
Missy6128 Ellen DeGeneres quotes (American Actress and stand-up Comedian, b.1958 New Orleans, Louisiana, USA)

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“Nothing says holidays, like a cheese log.”
Missy6128 Ellen DeGeneres quotes (American Actress and stand-up Comedian, b.1958 New Orleans, Louisiana, USA)
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“Oh she tripped?....Nooo, she's running. I thought she tripped but she's running. She stopped running, she did trip. You tripped!!!”
Missy6128 Ellen DeGeneres quotes (American Actress and stand-up Comedian, b.1958 New Orleans, Louisiana, USA)
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“Oh, you hate your job? Why didn't you say so? There's a support group for that. It's called EVERYBODY, and they meet at the bar.”
Drew Carey quotes (American Comedian, b.1958)
Similar Quotes. About: Humor quotes, Funny quotes, Hate quotes, Jobs quotes.
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“The problem with the designated driver program, it's not a desirable job, but if you ever get sucked into doing it, have fun with it. At the end of the night, drop them off at the wrong house.”
Jeff Foxworthy quotes (American comedian, b.1958)
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“Do you think God gets stoned? I think so . . . look at the platypus.”
Robin Williams quotes (American actor)
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“See, the problem is that God gives men a brain and a penis, and only enough blood to run one at a time.”
Robin Williams quotes (American actor)
Similar Quotes. About: Humor quotes, Funny quotes, God quotes, Comedy quotes.
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“You know the world is going crazy when the best rapper is a white guy, the best golfer is a black guy, the tallest guy in the NBA is Chinese, the Swiss hold the America's Cup, France is accusing the U.S. of arrogance, Germany doesn't want to go to war, and the three most powerful men in America are named 'Bush', 'Dick', and 'Colon.' Need I say more?”
santiz Chris Rock quotes
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“Women don't want to hear what you think. Women want to hear what they think -- in a deeper voice.”
santiz Bill Cosby quotes (American Actor, Comedian and Producer. b.1937, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania, USA)
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“"Hello?..Oh, hi Tom. Ooh, I've been dying to see that movie...Mmm no, I just opened up some yogurt. I am in for the night....Not even later, it's the kind with the fruit on the bottom. Thanks anyway. Have fun." "Oh...Sorry I'm late...Traffic. Hm. Really? How you think I got here? Hellacoptered in?"”
Missy6128 Ellen DeGeneres quotes (American Actress and stand-up Comedian, b.1958 New Orleans, Louisiana, USA)
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“Don't cry because it's over. Smile because it happened.”
santiz Dr. Seuss quotes (American Writer and Cartoonist best known for his collection of children's books. 1904-1991)
Similar Quotes. About: Life quotes, Goodbye quotes, Inspiration quotes, Feelings quotes. For: T-Shirt quotes.
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