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Johnny Carson quotes

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American TV Host, 1925-2005
Johnny Carson quotes

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    I Like this quote I dislike this quote“If life were fair, Elvis would be alive and all the impersonators would be dead.”

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    I Like this quote I dislike this quote“I know a man who gave up smoking, drinking, sex, and rich food. He was healthy right up to the day he killed himself.”

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    I Like this quote I dislike this quote“Talent alone won't make you a success. Neither will being in the right place at the right time, unless you are ready. The most important question is: 'Are your ready?''”

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    I Like this quote I dislike this quote“Married men live longer than single men. But married men are a lot more willing to die.”

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    I Like this quote I dislike this quote“If variety if the spice of life, marriage is the big can of leftover Spam”

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    I Like this quote I dislike this quote“Happiness is your dentist telling you it won't hurt and then having him catch his hand in the drill.”

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    I Like this quote I dislike this quote“The only thing money gives you is the freedom of not worrying about money”

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    I Like this quote I dislike this quote“Democracy means that anyone can grow up to be president, and anyone who doesn't grow up can be vice president.”

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    I Like this quote I dislike this quote“He couldn't ad-lib a fart after a baked-bean dinner”

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    I Like this quote I dislike this quote“I was so naive as a kid I used to sneak behind the barn and do nothing.”

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