“Pacifism is a wonderful conviction in theory, but only in theory. Real life has a way of eventually rubbing even the most altruistic nose in a steaming pile of "F**k that".”
“As long as our culture continues to fawn over its downward-aspiring lowest common denominators, the United States will remain a social and political punch line. As long as we continue tracking the every deed and fart of the Paris Hiltons and Kevin Federlines among us, we will continue to come out sixteenth best with regard to producing and introducing to the human race things of true substance worth appreciating for their aesthetic ingenuity.”
“I wonder when someone will grow the testicles to say to americans everywhere, 'Enough with the self-medicating.' Seriously. What ever happened to dealing with life? Life is pain. Life is inconvenience. Life is a tall, cool glass of "F**k You". Step away from the Prozac and Xanax, and Drink Up, Bitches. Refills are on the house...”
“Utter happiness is a fallacy. The best most of us can hope for is that occasional span of time which occurs at irregular lengths and intervals throughout our lives wherein for an all too ephemeral period, nothing in particular sucks about living.”
“On the Catholic priesthood: I refuse to consider anything said to me about saving my soul by any man who spends all his time with one hand on the Bible and his other hand thrust down the pants of an adolescent child. I don’t want to hear it.”